When It Rains...It Pours...

Well I am really trying not to make this blog all gloom and doom but for Pete sakes my life is just a crumbled mess right now.....Lets back track to 2 weeks ago where I left off when my Dad was going to see the doctor about his AML coming back...The news he got...wasn't good..

The doctor said there was either another Chemo treatment he could try which doesn't have high success results..or being able to stay home and get transfusions when he needed and a weekly shot to keep the leukemia side effects under control...but this would only give him about 4 months to live...

This news was devastating...  I did not go with my parents to this meeting with the doctor because I knew I wouldn't be able to handle what they were going to say...  They left the office with the doctors telling him that he could decide what he wanted to do.My dad is a fighter and chose to try the chemo but it wouldn't be ready until the following week.

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 That week was really tough for the first few days because we were all ready sad, lost, and not sure really what to do.  It helped that my Sister came home and my Aunt (Moms Sister) from Maryland came up to visit.  It was a nice distraction...

ON TOP of all this sadness...I find out that Wednesday that the company I work for is going to be closing its doors... AWESOME!  My Mom and Dad (when he wasn't sick) also work there too so this was another shock and hit to our family.  This is the source to the money my family makes and on top of all of our health insurance.  Thankfully they are not closing right away but will in a few months.   All I can think is, how can so many bad things be happening to us all at once?!  It is literally like we have a  dark cloud  above our heads.

 

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Jumping forward to this week. My Dad was admitted to the hospital Monday to start his 6 day chemo regimen.  I am trying everything I can do stay calm and strong for him.  The chemo will make his white cells bottom out to 0 so during this time he will be immune to getting any type of infection again.  Fingers crossed everything goes smoothly.  The doctor is letting him go home again after the chemo is done if there are no complications.  Tuesday we heard that the first dose of chemo killed 50% of the white cell blasts.  Which this is really good news!  Lets just hope that the chemo keeps doing its job to get this AML in remission so he can go get the bone marrow transplant.  The bad part is he got sick last night and his tummy has been upset but this is a common side effect from the chemo.

 

I visit him as much as possible and have been leaving work early to be with him longer.  I guess I got to use up my vacation and sick days before I lose them...  A lot of the time he is just falling in and out of sleep because its hard for him to sleep at night.  While he is resting I usually doodle in my sketch book.  Yesterday I grabbed the silver and gold markers I used for my DIY project and doodled on the front...

It looks kinda neat in the sunlight because the markers are metallic.

  

 

  Anyways, there has to be a light at the end of the tunnel.  There HAS to be.

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 Welp, that's all for now....I am sorry these are all unhappy posts but it is what it is and this is my life right now...

 

 

If anyone is willing and able to help our family it would be greatly appreciated...since we will be also losing our jobs soon the money part is going to be even tougher than ever..

http://www.gofundme.com/joekuznik

 

'Just Keep Swimming'

 

 

I was nominated for the Liebster Blog Award!

Oh my gosh!!! So I was just doing my daily read of the blogs I follow and noticed A Mermaid's Rambles blog about Liebster Blog Award.  As I am reading it I was like wow cool I wish I could do something like this...and as I scroll down she nominated me!!! I huge thank you to Vely!♥♥♥ She is one of the first blogs I started reading on here.  Go check her out her blogs are amazing!

So since I was nominated I wanted to know a little more about this award.  In doing some research I found out that it was created for new bloggers typically those with less than 200 followers to spread the word of their new blog along and also to get to know a little bit more about the bloggers themselves! This is a pretty neat way of getting your blog noticed and recognized! I also found out the word Liebster has German origins and means dearest, sweetest, kindest, nicest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant.

Rules:

1-If you are tagged/nominated, you have to post 11 facts about yourself.
2-Answer the 11 questions the tagger has given you and make 11 questsions for the people are are going to tag
3-Tag 5-11 more bloggers
4-Tell the people you tagged that you did (through comment, personal message, etc.)
5-No tagging back.

11 facts about myself:
1. - I am a Capricorn
2. - I was born 2 days before Christmas the 23rd
3. - My name was going to be Holly since I was going to be born so close to Christmas but my parents named me after a boat they saw on vacation in RI named 'Kelly'
4. - I love visiting new places
5. - Halloween is my absolutely favorite day of the year
6. - I am a certified shopaholic..haha...I have withdrawals, it makes me happy, I crave it..seriously :)
7. - I love full moons
8. - I dislike thunderstorms
9. - If I find a piece of clothing I really like I usually buy it in more than one color
10.- I had an extreme disaster with my hair about 2 years ago when I was platinum and I used a lightning spray to touch up my roots and then highlighted my hair a few days later.. a lot fell out and broke off from the over processing. (don't do it)  I have not used bleach since and have been trying to restore my hair.  I miss my blonde hair everyday and can not wait to be confident enough to get a least highlights again.  As of right now my hair is my natural color - a light brown, dirty blonde in the sun
11. - I think about getting more tattoos almost everyday.. There are so many I want!!

Here are my 11 answers to Vely:
1. What are the 2 words that you would use to best describe yourself? -  Emotional and Strange.  I am definitely my own person and I know that haha I am strange because I like my own things and don't care if anyone else does or not.  My sister says if I was an animal I would be a Unicorn :)  I am emotional because I get upset very easily.  I don't mean to, its just how I am. 
2. When and why did you started blogging? - Well I've always been into social media and followed others on blogs so I decided to start my own.  It also helps me release my thoughts somewhere.  I feel accomplished or a weight has been lifted after writing a blog post.
3. What's the meaning behind your blog title? - My favorite Movie is Labyrinth and it seems like my life is always a puzzle and turning corners so I thought Into the Labyrinth would be a perfect fit
4. Has your blogging experience turned out to be what you expected? - So far it is going okay, I am still new so I guess the followers take their time ;) psstt! Follow me!
5. What's your favorite post that you've written? - Probably Pups, Arcade games, Newport, RI, and Merica...  Because its the longest so far with the most pictures :)  I am still new here
6. What are the 2 things about yourself that you're most proud of? Wow...this one is a hard one... I guess I would say that I am proud that I have 2 jobs and not slumming through life.  It seems like everyday there are arrests made in my area of drugs and overdoses.  It sickens me that people just want to throw their lives away to that.  The other thing I am proud of is I am trying to be the best 'me' I can be.  Times do get tough and I am trying to stay strong and grow as a person.....if that makes any sense...  
7. What is the one thing that you like and dislike the most? The one thing that I like the most would have to be my family.. They are my everything...the one thing I dislike the most is sicknesses... Mostly referring to the Cancer my Dad is battling it is the worst thing in the whole world and I would do anything for it to go away..
8. What's one piece of advice that you'd like to share? Life advice, blogging advice.. anything! Stay true to yourself. 
9. What do you hope to achieve 5 years from now? Lets see. I will be 31...wow.. Well I hope by then I will be happily married, starting a family, be living in a nice home, and be working a job that I love...Perhaps in the makeup business?
10. What is your favorite quote? "Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered I have fought my way here"from The Labyrinth and "I swim for brighter days, despite the absence of sun" -Jacks Mannequin
11. Who are your top 2 blogging influencers?  I would have to say Mama Laughlin because she is absolutely hilarious, inspiring, a wonderful mom, and an awesome blogger!  The 2nd would be Kelly from Fatgirl-Gone fit She is ahhhhh-mazing!! and so inspiring. I started following her on instagram and can not believe her transformation. 

Here are the bloggers I nominate!
1. Ashleigh - This Life of Mine
2. Rebekah - Blue Giraffes and Concrete Jungles
3. Alyson - New England Living
4. Sarah -  Life Love and Dinner
5. Krisin - Crumbs and Curls
6. Kourtnee - Silver Linings
7. Briana - Sequin Gowns and Mermaid Crowns
(Since I am new to blogging I haven't read everyone's entire blog to see if they have been nominated before or not, so sorry if you already have been!)
 These are all fantastic blogs I think everyone should check out!

Here are my questions for the nominees to answer:
1- What kind of music do you listen to?  (name the top 3 songs on your ipod/iphone)
2- If you could have a free vacation anywhere, where would it be and who would you bring?
3- Who is your celebrity crush?
4- Have you ever seen the movie The Labyrinth?
5- What is your favorite TV series?
6- Where is your favorite place to visit?
7-What’s the most unusual thing you’ve eaten?
8-What is your favorite Movie?
9- Do you have a special talent or something unique about yourself?
10- How did you come up with your blog name?
11-What type of drink do you order at a bar?

This was fun and I hope you enjoyed reading it!! I look forward to reading the answers of the blogs I have nominated!

 

'Just Keep Swimming'

 

The 'c' word....

Do I write about this or not?  It's all I can think about and I have so many emotions stirring and the feeling of a tractor trailer on my shoulders...but its not a happy subject............

 

Since my dad had his second round of chemo the doctor let him stay home while his counts drop and recover this time instead of staying in the hospital.  This is because he wasn't as sick as he was the first round and won't need as much medical attention like he did before.  He has been getting blood tests 2-3 times a week and his counts have been going up.  But yesterday my mom texted me saying there was some bad news. I knew it...before she even texted me.  The other day I got the feeling something wasn't right and I tried to push those feelings to the side...  The doctors had found a lot of blasts in his blood..which can only mean one thing...the chemo did not work and the cancer is still there..

 

 I hate that word......cancer......every time I hear it or say it my whole body goes numb and I cringe.  Why does something so awful have to exist?  And lately I feel like it is everywhere....no matter where I go that word haunts me...maybe its just because I notice it more......but it just seems like its e v e r y w h e r e.. there is even a new movie 'The fault in our stars' based from a book about cancer and a new show 'Chasing life' specifically about Leukemia.  I guess it shows what people are going through but I can't handle watching them.  I even hear things about cancer on the radio, on commercials on tv, I drive by and see car washes for fundraisers.... I am NOT saying theses are a bad thing and I know they are helping and making people more aware but geesh...Just when I try to think of something else... BAM there it is again..

 

Anyways my dad is going today to find out what they plan on doing next.  It pains me to see him when he's worried or asking questions about what's going to happen...I know he's scared and I would be lying if I said I wasn't.  I just want everything to go smoothly for him and get back to normal.  He is a very active guy and it's hard for him to lay around all day... I know more chemo or having to go back in the hospital is going to upset him more.

 

It is so hard not to be upset and worried..but like my Mom reminded me the last time it came back.. I didn't get my tattoo for nothing. "Stay Strong"  Every time I am upset I look at it and try to stay strong for my Dad.  I don't want him to see me upset because I know that makes him feel bad...

 

No matter what they say what the next step is..we will get through it...My dad is a fighter and my hero.. I believe we can win this fight.. 

 

 

Well I can't say this was easy to write and it took me all day because I was trying to fight the tears...  I am posting this because maybe there is someone else out there in the same boat as I am in... I can surely tell you it is not easy...

 

Here is a song that helps me get through some tough times ...Swim by Jacks Mannequin

He has also battled leukemia

 

 

 That's all I got now... I guess its just waiting game to see what happens...

 

"Just keep swimming"

 

 

Mini DIY beach findings project

Hey guys! So I just came up with a little DIY project and thought I would share with you!  So my boyfriend and I travel to the beach or ocean-type towns every once in awhile and I thought of this neat idea! 

 When we recently went to Newport, RI we found perfect beach smooth stones and I wanted to keep them so I thought of the idea to write on them where I found them and the year. (My mom did this with a few large rocks she has found at the beach)  I usually pick up little shells and rocks from the different beaches I go to for souvenirs but end up losing them or throwing them away.  So I thought this would be a cute idea to remember where and when I got them from. 

 Then I was thinking how could I make these look cute and have them all in one place?  We went to Michaels this past Sunday and I found this fish bowl from for $5.99 and the colored glass rocks for $6.99 a bag. 

Sharpies

 

I also bought these oil based sharpies to write on the rocks for $4.99 ea. 

 I picked up gold, silver and white.  They work great and write so effortlessly on the rocks.

 

 

I then remembered where I put my beach findings from our Bermuda trip back in 2012!

 

 

 

Shells and porous type things like coral is a little harder to write on...

 

( don't mind the rainy day, I was trying to find the best lighting for the picture)

 

I can't wait to travel to our next destination so I can add to my collection!

I hope you liked this idea! :)

 

 

'Just Keep Swimming'

Pups, Arcade games, Newport, RI, and Merica...

Woahhhhhhhh well hello there.   I definitely did not forget about posting in this blog I was just kinda waiting for the right moment or something exciting to happen that I could write about haha...ok..sooo since its been a little awhile I guess I am gonna recap the last few weeks... be prepared its gonna be a long one....... (that's what she said) 

Since it has been so nice out, I've been playin with the pups outside a lot. Here's a few pics that I couldn't help taking. 

Ha I love both of these pics ^^  Zack isnt too fond of Cody because hes always jumping on him and trying to get him to play but I know he secretly love him. 

They got the water so gross from runnin in the garden then back in the pool haha but they looove jumpin in and going swimming

                        ^^My favorite picture of Cody                   ^^refilling the pool with clean water

          

                            ^^ Random sunset after one of the nights after playing with the pups

So last Thursday I went with my boyfriend and my friend Adrienne to my friend Robyn and Adams house to cook dinner and play with their son Dominic :)  He is such a cute little boy and hes growing up way too fast

So since I had this week off I stayed at Matt's house on Sunday and we went to check out a bar in Hadley that we've never been to. NERD ALERT: It's called The Quarters.  It was actually a pretty cool bar. It was lined with old arcade games that only cost a quarter! 

          

The drinks were different but good!  I got a mango lemonade with vodka and Matt tried a lavender drink with gin.

            

I really liked how most of the games were 2 player so we could play with and against each other instead of playing alone.  I think the last time I played space invaders I was like 10?

ok guys I had too sorry if its a tad TMI!!! I went to the bathroom and looked down and was like NO WAY!  Space invader floor tiles! Ha overall we had fun and will probably be back again soon!

Tuesday I had to go into work for few hours.  After I got out I went to Fosters, our local supermarket (which get fresh seafood from Boston a few times a week) to pick up some mussels for my Dad.  He was craving them again and I allllways can go for seafood. I picked 2 lbs of mussels and then noticed lobsters were on sale........I got a 3 1/2 pounder!!! I usually only get the 1 1/4lbs so this time I wanted to try a bigger one and split it with my Dad. 

Meet Mr. Barnacle Head

haha I had to take some pics of the barnacle on his head

Anywhoo it turned into a delicious dinner....I swear I am really a mermaid :)

So since I had the week off Matt and I planned a trip to Newport, RI for Wednesday and Thursday.  The ride wasn't too bad only 2 1/2 hours away.  Thankfully the weather was pretty nice and the rain held off there until we were already home.

The first day we walked around the town a bit got lunch at a tiny out door stand (fish and chips and clam strips) and then went Jetskiing!  I wish I got pictures of us but I had to put my phone in a lock box so it wouldn't get wet.  This was my first time and oh boy was a scared (that's also what she said)

Matt promised me that we wouldn't go fast.  It was a little windy out so it was quite choppy on the water.  I think we only went a little over 30mph and at that speed my butt wasn't touching the seat at times!!  We had so much water splashed on us that wen we got off we looked like we took a dip in the ocean with our clothes on.  Then as the salt water dried we could literately dust off the salt from our skin.  Nevertheless it was pretty fun. I would go again on a less windy day. 

Here are a few pics of the pier:

Once we got done jetskiing we went to the hotel to shower and then it was already time to get ready for dinner

    

We first got a drink at a place called Pier 49.  I got a rum swizzle and Matt got a dark and stormy 

after we drank those it was already 8:30 and all the dining places that we were looking at closed at 9!  Thankfully the bartender at the bar suggested Benjamin's which closed at 1 or 2 am. Perfect!

It was a really yummy dinner.  I wish I had taken some pics but it was took dark at that time.  We started with coconut shrimp which were pretty good.  I got the seafood casserole and Matt got cod with lobster sauce. It was all very good and not over priced. I am glad this place was suggested to us!

Then it was time to get an after dinner drink.  We found this place called The Landing which the guy at the lunch stand suggested to us. It was really a fun lively crowd with a live entertainment singer.  I really want to come back here it was a lot of fun!

So the next day we grabbed breakfast at our hotel.  Which I have to mention was an awesome hotel!  We stayed at the Homewood Suites in Middletown which was a 5 min drive up the road from downtown Newport.  This was an excellent hotel!  Anyways we wanted to drive around and look at all the fancy mansions.  Since we were not really sure where we were going we just drove around looking at them as we passed by.  We stopped at a little parking area and saw other people looking out on the ocean.  It was really foggy and cloudy out but it made the ocean look eerie and cool. There was a huge rock we stood on to look out.

We then went back into town to walk around, got lunch at a pizza place called Via Via and then started on our way back home :(  I was so sad and really didn't want to go.  I also wish I got to take more pictures but I forgot my car phone charger and my DSLR camera was just too big to lug around everywhere...oh well..next time!

We had to stop and get gas before we got going and as we pulled up I noticed the signs lol.... 'Smootie' and Snakes and Chips' hahaha crazy...don't you think these would need to be approved by a few people? ha I guess not

Welp here I am sitting on my couch writing this blog on the 4th of July.  I feel kinda lame that I am not out partying or something but I guess it is what it is.  I did have to work tonight but got out early since it was so slow.  I am pretty sure all the fireworks have been cancelled because of the hurricane coming too so I guess I am not missing much.  

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Because 'Merica!  Happy 4th Everyone! Stay safe and have fun

'Just Keep Swimming'